It is 1am, and I am a wake again

Well it is 1 am, I been laying next to my husband in bed awake. I have a cold/allergy rhinitis. It happens pretty much anytime the temperature drops in the teens or belows, and usually clears when temperature gets warmer. In the mean time I have a sorethroat, nasal drainage, sinus pain and such. A little Crack (sudafed, you know the goodstuff you have to give the pharmacist your first born child for) and motrin regularly will keep the symptoms in check. I go to bed at 10pm, very tired, because the same thing happened last night I ended up awake from 1am -5am. I was feeling fine, and boom, I roll over 1am feeling bad again. I hem haa about getting up to take something and I finally do, but now I can't go back to sleep. Instead of bothering my dh, like I would really like too, but won't because he will be up at 4am to leave for work early. I rarely see him these days, because of year end close, the tactical fund accounting and budgeting so forth. But laying next to him reminds me how fortunate I am to have him.

I love my husband. I do. I could point out all the bad things with him. He can roll together billion dollar accounts, tie in the loose pennies, and present it to investors and accrediting, financial institutions, like Gap and follow Fasby and present NCREF a meticulous accountingspreadsheet (which he will have 35 pages open at once). But he can't keep our budget to save his life.

My husband is very smart. Women I work with, or even go to church with, well asked time to time, "What does your husband do?" They are often surprized with my response. Their next words is often "He is very smart isn't he?" I love to smile and say yes he is.

He can do pretty much anything. My husband is an accountant. Now by saying that, that usually gives preconcieve notions about him. He is a book worm type, no personality, geek and knows numbers. That pretty much sums him up, except for the fact he is funny. A great sense of humor.

Did you know not only can he do taxes, but I have seen him drop a transmission in a truck by reading a book? When we were first married, my husband brother/mother gave him a truck (he lost his liscense for a DUI) and His other brother gave him the transmission for it (it used to be his truck). It cost him a total $12 to get the truck running. He took out the old tranny, and but in the rebuilt one, all by himself, with no foreknowledge. He has a basic one of automobiles, but not a major mechanic ability. He can change brakes, oil. belts and few other odd stuff that is about all. But more then most men I have soon come to find out.

Did you know my Dh know electricity. He helped his dad rewire our 100year old house. My DH family were all union electrictians, his uncle even taught the apprentice program for 25-30 years. DH is the white sheep of the family. His father, although divorced from his mother, always took a vital role in my DH life. He had him every weekend and most summers. He made DH work with him. He wasn't afraid to let DH get shocked. He taught DH to work and to work hard. He would make him dig a hole in the middle of the hot summer heat, the ground as hard as steel, struggle how to get the hole dug, and then request he fill it up when it was dug. DH has never been afraid of getting his hands dirty.

My DH is a marksman with his weapon. In the Army National Guard, he always quailfied as one of the top marksman in the Unit. He also set off the big guns, mortars. MY DH is hard of hearing, mainly because of 6 years setting off very loud weapons. He always got high marks in the National Guard, often times requesting he go to OTC, but because of work, he never could. I am so glad he didn't. If he did he would of made a career out of it and been in IRAQ. After 911, he really considered reenlisting, once again, glad he didn't.

He is a wonderful father.His girls are daddy girl's all the way. They love him so much. Our oldest at the beginning of the New Year asked if they can do a 1/2 marathon together at the Sunburst. DH is far from in shape, but he has lost 20lbs since Jan 1 and been training with her. Our youngest is still too small to do that, but right now they are only doing a few miles at a time. So they all daddy and the 2 girls run together. It is so cute. He takes the girls out shooting. He wants them to know how to handle a weapon and be comfortable with it. He teaches them safety techniques and answers their questions.

My dh is a fabulous cook. That is why we are so fat. He takes totally charge of anything in the kitchen. I am more then willing to eat it. He actually can can foods. He has made some awesome apple butter in the past.

My DH for 3 years at Purdue was an aviation technician major. He has worked on airplanes and knows pretty much any thing about them. For a hobby, DH reads random searches on wikipedia. He truly has a basic knowledge of pretty much anything you can think of. From Anatomy and Physiology, to why soap works.

You know I love my Dh. I heard a few weeks back about how some Christian women that had premarital sex with their spouse, end up hating or bitter towards their spouse. I don't understand that.

We lived together for 1.5 years, before we got married, we were intimate before then. I at know time ever blamed or could be bitter for that. That was my sin, just as well as his. I am probably more responsible because I was a Christian and he wasn't. How can a person that had willing sin, blame it on someone else, especially someone that they "Love".

I don't believe love is a feeling, it is an action. I choose who I love. I chose my DH because he really is a an extraordinary man.

My husband isn't necessarily the best Christian man out there. I am not blind. He does get ostracized by many men at church. He doesn't put on a show. He doesn't care what others think. He is friendly to all. That is something he taught me, teaching me. I do believe he is saved. he loves the Lord, just sometimes just don't know how to show it. Many men have this unique fraternity, or I should I call it "I am the Fairhaven graduate, attendee" group you're not welcome. If you didn't go to school here, you are no one spiritually. Don't even try to grow or succeed spiritually. Now obvisously that isn't all, but that is many. You know what, there is more then a Christians life then attending Fairhaven. Not the Fairhaven is bad, but it isn't mandated either to grow in your Christian faith. What people tend to forget or not understand until will started coming to Fairhaven. Church wasn't a vital part in our life. Spiritual growth wasn't happening. Although Dh was saved in 1999, being stagnant for the first 4 years doesn't amount to much. We have only been here since 2003, 4.5 years. Just getting use and accustom to things takes time. An immediate super Christian attitude shouldn't be anticiapted, because you can get that, but you can also burn out with that, when you realize you can't be all things to all men, and then you quit.

Isn't little growth better then no growth? Anyway, maybe that is why I am writing this. I lay in bed wide awake next to DH, and wonder why people at church don't really respect him more, after all he has all these good attributes? And the only conclusion I can see, they expect him to fit some cookie cutter mold. They got to realize, my DH will not hold a mold, but break it. I am thankful for a few of his good friends. They have been Christians alot longer then DH, and they have helped him grow stronger in the Lord because of that. I just wish more people would be willing to encourage, then ostercize.

DH is often oblivious or he doesn't care. Either way it doesn't effect him. but it does me. Maybe it is because I am his biggest cheerleader. I know how great he is, I just want others to see it too.